Hyped

I am hyped about my upcoming travel to India. I am in my NYC hotel room currently, having just finished eating two whole bagels (the first time in my life that I have eaten two bagels in a single meal). I was watching a YouTuber who reviews airlines’ business class offerings. I am stoked about my upcoming flight to India. It’s in business class (my dad paid for it, duh). The Emirates business class on A380!! It’s huge, and it’s luxurious. Oh my God, I want to show off. I want to show off that we travel in business class. I want to show off that we have money (at least for now)! But I know that showing off is a bad look. It is not the right thing to do.

I am also looking forward to visiting India after so many years. My face is ridden with acne scars, and I have put on so much extra weight at the offsite. But it’s okay. For the longest time, I have wanted to show off my slim body to my extended family. I grew up as a bullied fat kid. I want people to see how much better off I am now. There is a bar on the plane, and I can’t even drink due to my acne medication. How tragic! But I think I will try to do the right thing and not show off. I will hope that people find out indirectly that I travel in business class and raise their eyebrows.

I am also quite sad that I am not an American, and I think girls look down on me for that. I tried faking confidence in who I am on my two dates, but it might have looked embarrassing. I am also so shy. I don’t say hi to colleagues. I don’t stop by to chat. I need to change this if I want to become a successful businessman. I need to be more social. I need to try harder, and I need to improve my English. Fuck them girls, man. I am doing OK. (not an incel, by the way).

Cheers.